How to talk about kinks with your partner

After speaking with a friend the other day I realised most of us don’t have the sex life that would satisfy us. Even when you are with your partner we get comfortable in patterns and also at the same time uncomfortable having honest yet difficult conversations.

A friend who was with her boyfriend at least three times a week hadn’t had sex for over a month. She didn’t want to make her partner uncomfortable by discussing it and had suppressed her own sexual desire not to rock the boat. She didn’t want to talk about it.

Talking about sex in general with your partner can be hard but even more so, talking about kinks is a sensitive but important conversation for building trust and intimacy (and satisfaction).

My partner and I had the conversation recently about each of our sexual fantasies. I know he felt a little uncomfortable because his was a little out of the norm and I was non-judgemental but thoughtful. I was curious and later googled it! We didn’t discuss the topics further but I know it was a struggle for him to open up and I appreciated it.

Here are some tips on how to approach the topic:

1. Choose the Right Time and Setting:
— Pick a time when you both are relaxed and have some privacy.
— Choose a setting where you feel comfortable and secure.